The 2023 general election is fast approaching and once again we are bombarded with the same old slogans, bribes, lies and scaremongering from the same old parties. They tell us that this is the most important election of our lifetime, that we have to vote for them or else the country will go to hell, that we have to choose between the lesser of two evils, that we have to make our voice heard, that every vote counts, and so on and so forth.
But we at Not A Party know better. We know that voting is a waste of time, a meaningless ritual aimed at making us believe we are participating. We know that no matter who we vote for, the government always gets in. We know that the politicians do not represent us, they do not care about us, they do not listen to us and, what’s more, they hold us in extreme contempt, issuing barefaced lies that the gullible swallow whole. You are not gullible are you? Politicians can only be relied upon to serve their own interests and those of their corporate masters. We know that democracy has devolved into a fraud and a hoax. We know that the system is rigged, corrupt, and too broken to fix.
That is why we are running in this election. Not to win, not to change anything, not to make a difference. But to comment on the system as it is: a sham. We are here to show you that there is another way: not voting for us.
Not voting for us is not apathy, nor is it ignorance, nor surrender. It is a powerful statement, a defiant act, a revolutionary gesture. It is a way of saying: we do not consent, we will not comply, we shall not cooperate with our disempowerment. We are not slaves. Almost 100% of the registered voters in New Zealand do not vote for us, and about 20% don’t vote at all, and we think that’s a pretty powerful statement. You too can be part of the rebellion.
Not voting is also a lot more fun than voting. Instead of wasting your precious time and energy on filling out a ballot paper that will end up in the bin anyway, you can do something more enjoyable and productive with your life. You can become part of a parallel decentralized community and take back your power.
That is why we are asking you to join us this election. Do not fall for the lies and propaganda of the mainstream, legacy parties. Do not let them manipulate you and guilt-trip you into voting. Do not give them your consent and legitimacy. Do not participate in their game.
Instead, vote for Not A Party by not voting at all. Show them that you are smarter than them, that you are stronger than them, that you are better than them. Show them that you are not a party to their madness.
We have two candidates running in this election: Richard Goode in Mana and Bob Wessex in Ōtaki. They are both seasoned veterans of non-voting activism and have proven themselves to be experts at losing elections. They have both received the lowest number of votes in their respective electorates in previous elections and aim to repeat their success third time around.
They will not be attending any debates because they are not prepared to try and manipulate you into believing what they believe. They are just getting on with life as they do every single other day of the electoral period. Not voting. They are not prepared to just sit there and look bored or amused or confused or whatever suits their mood or opinion at the time. They will also not be distributing flyers and stickers and posters around their electorates, because 4 decades later they STILL believe in preserving the rainforests. Instead they will be full of contradiction, confusion, nuance and innuendo.
They will also be doing some media interviews if they get the chance, but they will not answer any questions or make any statements or give any opinions. They will just ramble on about random topics or make funny noises or say whatever comes into their heads at the moment. It is in imitating politicians in this way that Not A Party believe they are making their strongest contribution to the political process.
Goode and Wessex may make some social media posts if they feel like it, but they will not regularly engage with anyone or promote anything or endorse anyone. They will just post some memes or videos or links or whatever they find amusing or interesting or annoying. On some days they will do nothing at all.
They will also not be doing any street actions even if they have the opportunity. They will not protest anything or support anything or demand anything. They will just do whatever they think will make people laugh or think or question.
They will also be doing some other things if they have the time and resources, but they will not reveal what they are or why they are doing them or what they hope to achieve by doing them. They will just do them because they can and because they want to.
They will do all these things not because they care about politics or society or anything like that. They will do them because they enjoy doing them and because they want to have some fun and because they want to make a point.
The point is: this is not the only way. You do have options. Do you know what they are?
So please join us in making this election the most important one of our lifetime by making it the last one of our lifetime. Let’s make this election the one that ends all elections. Let’s make this election the one that breaks the system. Let’s make this election the one that starts a new era.
Let’s make this election the one that we do not vote in.
Let’s make this election the one that we NAP in.
Thank you for not voting for us.
P.S. If you are still not convinced that not voting is the best option, here are some more reasons why you should not vote:
- Voting is bad for your health. It exposes you to germs, stress, and violence. You could catch a cold, a flu, or a bullet. You could also get hit by a car, a bus, or a meteorite. Why risk it?
- Voting is bad for your wallet. It costs you money, time, and energy. You have to pay for transport, parking, and snacks. You have to waste your precious hours and minutes on something that does not matter or make any difference whatsoever. You have to exert yourself physically and mentally for nothing. Why bother?
- Voting is bad for your soul. It compromises your integrity, dignity, and morality. You have to lie to yourself, to others, and to the ballot box. You have to choose between evils, lesser and greater. You have to support a system that oppresses you and others. Why do it?
- Voting is bad for your planet. It contributes to pollution, waste, and destruction. You have to use paper, plastic, and metal that could be recycled or reused. You have to emit carbon dioxide, methane, and other greenhouse gases that could be reduced or avoided. You have to support a system that exploits and degrades the environment. Why allow it?
So there you have it. Voting is bad for you, bad for others, bad for everything. Not voting is good for you, good for others, good for everything. The choice is clear: not voting is the way to go.
Thank you for not voting.
P.P.S. If you are still not sure how to not vote, here are some tips on how to do it:
- Do not go to the polling station. If you accidentally go there, leave immediately after not voting for us.
- Do not fill out a ballot paper. If you somehow get one, spoil it or eat it.
- Do not put your ballot paper in the ballot box. If you somehow do that, do not worry, it will not count anyway.
- Do not follow any instructions or directions from anyone at the polling station. If they try to tell you what to do or where to go, ignore them or tell them to **** off.
- Do not listen to any advice or opinions from anyone about voting. If they try to persuade you or influence you or guilt-trip you into voting, tune them out or tell them to **** off.
- Do not watch any news or media about the election. If they try to inform you or entertain you or scare you about the election, turn them off or tell them to **** off.
- Do not care about any results or outcomes of the election. If they try to celebrate or commiserate or analyse the election, shrug them off or tell them to **** off.
That’s it. That’s how you not vote. It’s easy, simple, and effective.
Thank you for not voting.
P.P.P.S. If you are still reading this article, congratulations! You have just wasted more time than it would take to vote. But don’t worry, we don’t mind. We appreciate your attention and interest in our cause. We hope you enjoyed reading this article as much as we enjoyed writing it.
Thank you for reading.
And thank you for not voting.